The Dilemma That Faces Us All

4/5/2024

Virtues weave the tapestry of our life and make us virtuous, make us human and contribute to the wellness of life. Virtues connects us and creates harmony in the world. One of the core virtues is forgiveness. I love the famous wise saying: To err is human, to forgive is divine. We all have small errors and big errors. I forgive myself for making a mistake. Such forgiveness comes from the heart. And such forgiveness elevates my consciousness. Forgiveness has two sides of the coin connected with each other: self-forgiveness and forgiveness of others. Both are essential to complete the circle of virtuous living. As the author of the article Kent Nerburn writes," It is the glue that holds the human together. It is the way to bridge the loneliness that often surrounds us. Genuine forgiveness is a way to build that bridge." As a human being I have made many mistakes. That way I have hurt myself and others close to me. I cultivate truthfulness courage and boldness to recognize such mistakes and forgave myself for hurting me and others related to me. With kindness and compassion I have forgiven myself. And there are people who have hurt me. I lit the light of forgiveness for me and for others. This way I am building the brides of loving kindness. How about people who do not raise their voice against injustice and take a stand? They are afraid of retaliation. We must not act out of fear but act with courage. And those who have courage to act eventually succeed. Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr and Dalai Lama are living examples of living courageously and bravely for fighting against injustice. Let us enkindle the light of forgiveness and remove the darkness within and without ourselves. Let join our hands and be the torchbearers of forgiveness.
Namaste!

2 Comments

Therese M Griffin link

4/6/2024 02:37:32 pm

Kent Nerburn: This is the dilemma that faces us all when we decide to walk the difficult path of forgiveness. As a child you observe family adults, babies, adolescents, teachers, and strangers’ actions and behaviors. Did their behavior match their claim of holiness and righteousness? I was hearing words that didn’t match. Yet, older family members claim that “Therese never did like our people.” What does that mean? Where did I belong? As a child into adulthood, I felt shunned.
I fell into a world of anger. I became a giant defensive woman. No one was big enough to hurt me. That leads to a large heap of disadvantages including the world of alcoholism. I saw others who loved to laugh like myself. I have my mothers’ boom of laughter.
Even though I was misjudged I had to cut the negative ropes because I wanted the attitude of healthiness. Look for what’s going right in others and yourself. Why should I forgive others who are hateful even to a child? How do I break the cycle?
My road to forgiveness is to embrace others’ brokenness. That may sound ridiculous. Yet, when I walk empathically in their shoes, I may receive the gift of their hidden being abused or misjudged secrets of their hurts and low-self-esteem. I become more centered and understanding. I can’t fix them. No one expects that of me. I’ve learned I am the Beloved Daughter of our Creator and to love others as myself. I am able to join a larger world of goodness by joining hands.

Debbbie Podwika

4/16/2024 09:00:21 pm

This is very timely for me as I have just been thinking and journaling about this lately. So first, how can I judge someone when, like me, God designed us and made us who we are, we have no choice of what we like or dislike or become because he gave us the brain that liked a Milky Way versus a Three Musketeers, what music we like, whether we like to do crafts or not, if we’re a sports person or not, whether its’s playing sports or even watching sports. He also picked the family we would be raised in, be it our biological parents or adopted, who would shape and mold us to some degree. So how can we judge others if their brain is from God and the environment they are raised in is from God. AND further, with this in mind and if God is LOVE, how can he judge us? First, judging is not LOVE. Next, He says we have FREE WILL, but it is with the brain and environment he picked for us. We know that some brains can understand things more than others. We know that some environments are sooo much more wonderful than others, from the people who are in it, the education system, the community and its resources, the physical environment, and the time period which also shapes all of these. For this reason I do my best to not judge and forgive everyone. Now, I will admit it is very hard for me to understand and forgive someone like Hitler and other humans who harm people in many different ways, but again, I don't know how their brain is. I don't know how they were raised. I don't know why they do not understand what they are doing is wrong or as Dr. Jerome Kagan says, they have not developed Moral Emotions. If they do not understand or do not care then I feel their is something wrong with their brain and I have to have compassion enough to forgive them. I have to have gratitude that I understand the difference and do not act as they are. I have no doubt this is also why I found Psychology so fascinating from the first class I took. I try to breathe and forgive people as much as I can. I remember just because I forgive them, does not make what they did right, and I don't have to accept this behavior in the future. I can have barriers and limits.

My parents raised me with the saying, "If you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem." I know I cannot be complicit. The writer discusses whether we allow the darkness to continue or we shine a light or use equal force, righteous indignation. I can't imagine just allowing the darkness, again, Hitler and others like him, but I also do not believe just shining the light will work with them. I don't think their brain actually would understand it. This is many times the dilemma for those who do not want to go to war. Do we perceive them as equally wrong? Jesus became very angry in his Father's Temple when people were not using it as they should have. Jesus certainly was not Light at that moment. Yet, Jesus also says to turn the other cheek. There had been wars back before, during and just after the time of Jesus and from what I understand in the Bible it has to do with what is "just," but again that can be in the eye of the beholder. I think we should get upset when their are injustices in the world but how to change those injustices I think depends on what situation we are talking about. This is also where we need to keep in mind we may judge the behavior but not the person. If we can stop the injust behavior without aggression then I believe that is best. However, I do believe at times that is not possible. It is a shame, but I do understand it.

Mindfulness

The Dilemma That Faces Us All

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