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Barbara Fredrickson's excerpt from her book Positivity is mentioned in the Awakin.org website for us to enjoy. Though, she has withdrawn her support for the positivity ratio, its a great read. Below is my reflection to the article:
I have learned from my personal experience that life is not a straight line. It has curves, twists and turns. I have experienced negative emotions such as fear, depression and anger. They are not easy to control. Such negative emotions have made my life difficult. There are two ways of dealing with such negative emotions: denial,suppression or rationalization. The other way is to recognize them, and work on them or get professional help. Some time ago I went for one week long silent retreat. The first two days were difficult for me. I am not used to remaining silent for more than a day. It was a new and difficult experience for me. I felt restless, agitated, and bored. I accepted my difficult emotions and difficult times. After two days it was easy for me to remain silent. In fact I enjoyed the presence of silence and saw the value and power of silence. I spent a good amount of time on introspection and also seeing the peaceful beauty of nature. Silence opened up new doors of perception for me. Keeping my mind and heart open and maintaining self-awareness helps me to tap into genuine heart-felt positive emotions. I feel inner fullness when I experience love, kindness, joy and compassion. There is fullness in such genuine positive emotional experiences. Since there is genuine fullness and richness in such living, I do not need to grasp for the counterfeit gold. Namaste!
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It is quite obvious that I did not have my voice to choose when and where I was to be born. That was beyond my control. But I have freedom to make my choices about how to live my life. I did not have control over what genes I was going to inherit from my parents. But I have freedom to create wholesome internal environment and external environment. Have I always made the wise choices?Of course not. There were times when I knew what was the right way to go but my actions were not in alignment with what I knew. I paid the price for it, learned from my wrong turn, and took the right path. It is a matter of choice making. I use my "second arrow"-the arrow of how to relate to my situations and experiences, as the Buddha has taught us.
One of the most difficult decisions I needed to make was about marrying someone whom I loved dearly. She came from a different caste, from an upper class, and from a different religion. I was the first person in my family to have an inter caste marriage. I followed the voice of my heart and faced whatever I had to face for making my choice. That was a big and bold step in my life. And that has laid a strong foundation for me for making right-wise- choices in my life. Experience is a great teacher. Book knowledge is helpful but not enough. I need to cultivate and nourish my need to self-actualize. It is not always easy to sing my song when the people close to me either turn their ears away or use their tongue against me. The gate of freedom is narrow and the road is hard.There are times when like Rabindranath Tagore says, "Walk alone even when nobody cares to listen to your voice." Love and courage help me to follow my voice. The above comments was my reflection to the article posted here. Namaste! The two words that stand out from Larry Yang's passage are Freedom and Imperfections. We all want to be free from suffering, from our limitations created by conditioning of our mind. It is a a journey, a process of making invisible visible, a process of moving from non-awakening to awakening. As the author states: " We can't experience awakening without experiencing not awakening." We cannot see inner light without seeing inner darkness. There is an ancient Vedic prayer which says " Lead from unreal to real, from darkness to light, from mortality to immortality."
We all know that every culture, every society, every family conditions our mind. If we are not aware of the conditioned patterns of mind, we operate on automatic pilot. So the first step is to be aware of habitual conditioned patterns of aware mind. In order to be free from such habitual patterns I need to remain awake and move towards light.Is it easy? Of course not. There are times when my conditioned mind judges others of different race, culture, and religion. The light of mindful awareness helps me to see my own dark shadow, my un-awakened mind, and it facilitates my journey towards light. Awakening and non-awakening are two sides of the coin of mind and heart. Practicing mindful awareness of my non-awakening helps me to shift from non-wakening or darkness to awakening or light. Namaste! Mark Mason's article from Transaction To Trust made me think deeply. Conditional relationships are transactional relationships. They are bargaining relationships. They are deal making relationships. Such relationships are normal in the material or worldly world. We may have the same kind of conditional mindset in our personal and interpersonal relationships. Such mindset is based on the following equation: If only when you do this thing for me or if only when I get this then I will be with you. We all know that such a mindset may bring achievement or gratification for a while. Loving relationships are not founded on if when and then equation. They are unconditional. The foundation of such relationships is unshakable trust or faith.Without faith there is no true and enduring love.
I was blessed to have people in my life who mostly related to me unconditionally. The early childhood experiences of unconditional love have built a solid foundation for my personality development. It is my belief based on my experiences that the vibrations of un-conditionality bring non-transactional people together- the law of attraction! As Mark Mason says, "It is difficult to act unconditionally." Yes. It is not that easy. It requires a shift from transactional mind to trusting heart. According to the wisdom tradition it requires sadhana-daily mindfulness practice. Trusting others begins with trusting oneself, cultivating faith in oneself- making a gradual shift with awareness. Namaste! Kahlil Gibran has written a simple thought provoking passage and below is my reflection to it:
Are there two separate identities-the river identity and the ocean identity? Or is there One identity? Outwardly, there appears two identities like the river and the ocean. But when they embrace each other and merge into each other, they become one. When I love someone deeply, I become one with her. There are no twos. In pure love there is only one. They may appear two. Pure love creates a union of two and they become one. When I consider myself as body-mind complex, I have a separate identity. Two different names and forms. My true identity is nameless and formless. According to the ancient Vedanta philosophy, My True identity is Divine identity. It is not bound by my individual identity. When I merge into the ocean of Divinity, I become one with it. We may call it soul identity. When I got deeply connected with my beloved I felt I was in a different , unfamiliar and unchartered territory. Since I had not traveled on this love path before, at times I felt the fear of the new territory. It did not stay longer. The light of true love dispelled that fear. It brought deep unending joy and fulfillment in me as well as in my beloved. We became one. When I let go of my ego and open my heart to the other person, I shed my individual body-mind identity, the river identity, I became one with the ocean-like identity. I call it Spiritual Identity. I become mindful when I sense my ego identity arising in my consciousness. I sense the shadow of darkness coming and I mindfully make a shift from darkness to light. I meditate on the Vedic mantra in Sanskrit "Asato ma sad gamaya, tamsormajyotir gamaya, mrityor ma amritamgamaya. Om shantihi, shantihi, shantihi" Lead me from untruth to truth, from darkness to light, from mortality to immortality. Om Peace, Peace, Peace! Namaste! Robin Wall Kimmerer is a botanist and a poet. Here is my reflection to the excerpts from her book: Gathering Moss: A Natural and Cultural History of Mosses
I deeply resonate with the basic message of this thought provoking passage authored by Robin Wall Kimmerer: " To find something, don't look for it." In Indian philosophy, there is a concept of the Third Eye. That eye reveals the glory and awe of the vastness of the universe. We get a glimpse of it when let go of the limited capacity of our worldly eyes . Worldly eyes sadly create boundaries that separate us from the oneness of life. When we let our inner spiritual eyes open, the truth is revealed. Our inner world expands and welcomes the guests coming from nowhere. Unconditional love, openhearted and open-mindedness open the doors for the unnamed guests to come. I have had glimpses of such experiences more in my childhood than in my adulthood. I am very fond of spending time with nature. When I was a child I used to sit under a tree that I had planted in my back yard. Sitting under the tree doing nothing and expecting nothing to show up, I used to get glimpses of the beauty unfolding enriching my inner life. When I walk mindfully in nature or do sitting Mindfulness Meditation I get such glimpses that create feelings of wonder and awe. Reading about such mystical experiences is one thing. For experiencing the mystery of life I need to keep my mind and heart unoccupied and open to receive blessings coming from the unknown space. This openness helps me to the possibility of receiving such gifts. There is a wise saying in Sanskrit."Tad dure tad antike". What you think is far, is right close to you." Do not look for it outside. It is dwelling inside of you. Namaste! Otto Scharmer's article on Four Types of Listening makes me reflect on how do I listen, what's my listening style. "Ya, I know that already." When I read something or listen to something that I already know, my curiosity level is more on the surface level. As the author writes I am listening by downloading. There is nothing new to learn. It confirms what I already know. Breaking News is mostly not really breaking news.
"Ooh, look at that!". This kind of listening has wonderment, something new. It perks my years. It stirs up my curiosity. In the morning when I look out from my window, I marvel when I listen to the birds talking to each other. Though I have heard them talk before but I feel the newness in their chirping. This happens when I read a poem. It may be a new poem or the poem I have read before. I wonder from where does this newness emerge? The author labels it as Object-focused or Factual Listening. It does sound right to me. Maybe, I missed the boat! " Oh, yes, I know how you feel!" This is Empathetic Listening. This level of listening requires cultivation of the intelligence of the heart. When I see an angry or hateful face or a fearful or sad face my I listen from my heart. I empathize with them. Such listening makes me understand the other person on inner and deeper level. " I can't express what I experience in words". The author names this kind of listening Generative Listening. This kind of listening happens to me when I am in soul-to soul relationship or spiritual relationship. I am in a Being Zone. I feel at home. I discover my real self. The outer and the inner walls go away. A deep sense of oneness dawns upon me. I would name it Spiritual Listening. My life journey has gone through different phases of my development. It is an ascending journey with some ups and downs and twist and turns. It is not a straight line. Taking time out to meditate, introspect and reflect keeps me walking on this path. Namaste! David Mckee has written an interesting article and following is my reflection to it:
The ideas of stability and hospitality are very important as we are going through times of uncertainty, fear and anxiety. We all are facing new challenges. How to make our life stable and relate to these challenges without being uprooted is a BIG question for all of us. Ignoring, denying orminimizing is not the answer. Acknowledging and accepting what is happening is my way of relating to these challenges. I relax my body and mind regularly, practice mindfulness meditation, go with the flow of the reality as it is, and use the free time I have by helping other people in my life. Serving other people selflessly and doing good work creates loving and kind flow of energy in me. I am very grateful to the spiritual teachers in my life for teaching me how to be open , stable, grounded, calm, and compassionte. These precious gifts have helped me when I go through darkness in my life. Daily practice of living consciously and mindfully has made my life stable and hospitable. Non-judgmental loving awareness of myself and others has become my way of living. It is very fulfilling and gratfying. Namste! This essay authored by Kate Murphy reminds me of a saying my father used to say in Sanskrit "Ati parichayatavagna" meaning too much closeness in relationship results in indifference. I often hear parents and children saying "I have heard it before and there is nothing new you're going to say." So they turn their deaf years and miss a great opportunity to listen to each other's evolving story. In any close relationship we should not be bound by the assumptions that the other person is going to play the same record and nothing new is going to emerge. The foundation of intimate relationship is LOVE. Love keeps my heart and mind open to listen to the other sharing his or her evolving life story.
We have an extended family age ranging from 22 to 95. My daughter gets tired of taking care of many things in her everyday life. She gets tired and at times exhausted. She and I are early risers which give us time to talk during our half an hour coffee time. Last Friday she talked about her getting exhausted by doing so many tasks. We came up with an idea of having one hour family meeting on every Saturday morning to listen to each other and create a schedule for the week to lessen the burden of my daughter. We did meet last Saturday. It was an open minded and open hearted communication meeting. She felt so much relieved and grateful for being listened to by all in the family. Her burden is lightened and she gets less tired. We are going to have such weekly meetings for listening to one another and enriching our relationships. Loving and caring for one another with an open mind and open heart and taking time to listen to each other deepens our understanding of each other and our relationships. Finding time from our busy life for listening deeply is crucial for our family wellbeing. Namaste! Lynne Twist has written a touching article and below is my reflection on it:
It is my understanding based on my experiences that deep joy comes from facing pain, suffering and hardship rather than running away from it. It is like going through the heat of the fire to experience coolness. It sounds counter intuitive and paradoxical. Deep joy is born in the womb of love. Mother goes through the agony and pain of birthing the baby and feels deep joy when the baby comes out from the womb. Such joy is not temporary. The flow of joy keeps on flowing when she raises her baby who goes through passages of life. Her source of deep joy is pure and unconditional love for her child. Suffering is the first noble truth according to the Buddha. We all suffer physically, mentally, emotionally and relationally. I have experienced such suffering through out my life. Such experiences have been beneficial to me. By facing such experiences and by going through them I have become more empathic, compassionate and kind to myself and to others. I know where, how and why my shoe pinches and that way I have learned where, how and why other's shoe pinches. Such knowing comes from facing our suffering with compassion and kindness for ourselves and for others in our lives. Denying, averting or reacting to suffering causes more suffering. The tree of love grows by nurturing the seeds. Self nurturing and nurturing other folks in my life helps the tree not only to survive but also to flourish. Working on myself mindfully has been very helpful to me. Serving others selflessly has always brought deep joy, contentment, fulfillment, and happiness in my life. In that sense I feel the same way like the author Lynne Twist says: "The harderI work the more I love." Namaste! |
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